Article 2, Section 1, Clause 5 of the United States Constitution:
“No Person except a natural born Citizen, or a Citizen of the United States, at the time of the Adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the Office of President; neither shall any Person be eligible to that Office who shall not have attained to the Age of thirty five Years, and been fourteen Years a Resident within the United States.”
Origami Boulder Company — Original Origami Gifts!
From the FAQ:
Q: Origami boulder? Aren’t you talking about a wadded up piece of paper?
A: Yes dumb dumb! I already explain this at beginning. Why you too lazy to read first before you ask obvious question like this? People on Internet not very smart.
Q: Is this some kind of a joke?
A: You want joke? Look in mirror, you ugly person! This site real. You order wadded paper origami boulder and see for yourself.
This very nice artwork that come with card and make good gift for your friend. Your friend never forget you when you send fine art gift like this! I am famous Internet artist, so original wadded paper origami art become VERY VALUABLE some day. Especially haiku version, because it is double artwork.
I repeat — site is real, artwork is real. You order origami boulder and it comes in mail and you enjoy it.
Q: What is the haiku option?
A: You don’t know nothing about anything! Haiku is Japanese poetry. It goes with wadded paper because Origami is also Japanese. Don’t you understand anything about other culture? People on Internet are so stupid sometimes, but not the ones who buy wadded paper origami boulder with haiku!!!
Q: But how can I read the haiku if the paper is in a boulder shape?
A: You can’t, but it there. What is the sound of one hand clapping, dumb dumb?
Q: But can’t I unfold the page to read the haiku?
A: You unfold wadded paper, you ruin artwork! Don’t be stupid. Haiku is there. I even write it in English. You not read it though.
I give example:
Buy wadded paper
from very famous artist
and then you like it
I write a different new one for every haiku order, ok? You will like it very much but you don’t read it because it ruins artwork.
Q: What is the Performance Art option?
A: This brand new innovation in Origami Boulder wadded paper art! You buy Performance Art option. Then artist wad up artwork create custom for you, and throw directly into waste basket. You just paid for custom performance art! You receive email describe performance. If wish, write name or other small message in comment box and artist say, “This art made for _____” when perform.
VERY IMPORTANT. You not get anything in mail when you order Performance Art option. Artist truly create artwork and throw in wastebasket and email when finished. You pay for this art performance, not physical art that come in mail.
Q: Do you have a money back guarantee?
A: Money back guarantee? This not Wal-Mart dumb dumb! This work of art from artist — me! You ask Picasso for money back? I don’t think so! You no ask me for money back either. You don’t like art work, you sell it on Ebay and get your money back or go away. It already cheaper than Starbucks, so what else you want from me?
Q: Do you do custom pieces?
A: Finally good question!! This is the kind of person who should visit site, not dumb people too cheap to spend money. Yes, I make custom piece for you! Only $25! You send me piece of paper and I wad up for you and send back with Priority Mail!
Recommended item for custom artwork include Enron or Pets.com stock certificate, breakup letter from girlfriend, collection letter from landlord or moon deed. Then it become valuable one day and you have last laugh!
Q: What kind of paper do you use?
A: This also intelligent question from person who appreciates art. I use very expensive paper called Old Money. It is made from real money! It is 100 percent recycled with 30 percent post-consumer currency and 70 percent recovered cotton.
That means you send me money and I send you money back. Only my money is artwork and you can’t spend at the mall so don’t try it or you go to jail. Card explaining artwork made from Old Money card stock. It is even light green like dollars and very nice to look at. I don’t use cheap paper because my art serious and no joke.
Q: Why do you use PayPal?
A: I go to bank to accept credit card and banker says, “You can’t sell wadded paper. That’s not a real product or service.”
I lose patience and scream at banker and tell him, “You banker, not art critic dumb dumb!!! You don’t know nothing about art. Wadded paper art much better than Andy Warhol painting of soup can or that guy who put crucifix in big jar of urine! At least my art not offensive or stupid picture of food product!”
Now I can never accept credit card directly because I get escorted from bank by big man with gun. I use ATM and drivethrough now so banker doesn’t see me and call police.
Q: Can I order now?
A: Yes! Order online now please and I send you artwork and you like it very much. I tell you for last time that artwork is real, and you really get art in mail when you order.
How bout we not add yet another horrible sounding whatever-”sphere” to the already burgeoning list of other *spheres.
Buzzword first found on Dawn and Drew’s site.
Started a new contract gig down in south phoenix, not to mention my other hobbies, etc.
Over at MP2, we’re currently looking for a great Windows Client coder (could be C++, C#, Java, Python, whatever). BitTorrent + RSS experience would be killer, too. If you know of anyone who fits that description, and wants to join an awesome team still “in the garage,” drop me a line.
I love you guys.
You guys really fucking rock. Really.
Yours truly,
-Shanti
hit me up anytime:
Skype: shantibraford
IM: shantibraford
etc (see to the right)
Got to see Andrew Volpe and the guys from Ludo play this weekend in Tempe. Great show, despite the fact that the promoters royally screwed them by placing them dead last in the lineup. Normally, that would be a good thing, but not so this time.
A few of the guys came back & crashed on my couch & floors. Seeing them like that in the morning reminded me what Rock ‘n’ Roll is all about. Not the Puff Daddy bullshit you see on ‘Making the Band’ - where p.diddy blabs about “you aint shit in hip-hop unless you got flatscreen. i got flatscreen in my toilet.” I honestly think Puff Daddy is well-educated and could speak like a university graduate if he wanted, it would just ruin his “street cred” if he actually annunciated his words properly.
But anyway, yeah… sleeping on tile floors, bumming $1 Tostino’s pizzas off your host, touring relentlessly throughout the country for $0, being excited when you get offered a 12 oz. can of Dr. Pepper, this is what being a rockstar is all about.
…oh yeah and, for everything else, there’s Mastercard.
Veteran journalist J.D. Lasica interviews Skype co-founder and CEO Niklas Zennström about the future of voice communication, using Skype through wi-fi handhelds, and the coming death of the telecom dinosaurs:
Please give me a quick backgrounder on Skype.
We were founded on Aug. 29, 2003, and now have 70 employees, about half in London and half in Tallinn, Estonia, and some in Luxembourg. With our work at Kazaa, we began seeing growing broadband connections and more powerful computers and more streaming multimedia, and we saw that the traditional way of communicating by phone no longer made a lot of sense. If you could utilize the resources of the end users’ computers, you could do things much more efficiently.
So what is Skype all about, and what’s the difference between Skype to Skype and SkypeOut?
Skype to Skype lets you call anyone else in the world who has downloaded the Skype application on their computer or PDA [personal digital assistant], for free. You just download the free software from our site. With SkypeOut you can call anyone anywhere in the world at cheap local rates, often two or three cents a minute.
How many Skype users are there, and how fast is it growing?
We have 2 million users in the U.S. and about 13 million worldwide in more than 200 countries. We’re getting 80,000 new users each day. And more than half a million people are connected via Skype at any given moment. In fact, we just surpassed our first 1 million simultaneous users online. The average call time is over 6 minutes - longer than traditional phone calls.
What’s with that goofy “o” thing in your last name?
What?
You know, that goofy ö-thing, with those goofy dots over it.
You mean an umlaut?
Yeah, whatever.
Uhhh…
Well…?
I’m not sure what your question is.
Read the rest on Engadget.
MY MODEST PROPOSAL: THE U.S.A.R.
By C. B. Shapiro
I feel bad for the Red States.
Yes, they won the White House, Congress, the Supreme Court and most of the state houses. But they still can’t have the country they really want because the last few Blue States won’t roll over. So I am making a simple proposal:
Secession. Divorce. Splitsville.
Personally, I think we made a huge mistake not letting them go when we had the chance back in 1862. Well, no time like the present to correct an old mistake.
Then, they would finally be free to have the kind of society they’ve always wanted; church and state can be fused so they build the kind of theocracy they’ve dreamt of, with Jesus at the helm. Then the new USAR (United States of America Red) can ban books, repeal civil rights, persecute gays and have all the wars they like. They want prayer in schools? More power to them. They can ban abortion and post the Ten Commandments in every federal building in their country. Bring back slavery, if they want. We’ll be free to live with our like-minded countrymen who believe in science, modernism, tolerance, religion as a personal choice, and truly want limited government intrusion in our personal lives. Why should each side be driven mad by the other any more, decade after decade?
Call the Culture War a tie and everyone go home.
Of course, we in the U.S.A.B. get the Gross Domestic Product, businesses and universities of California, New York, Massachussetts — basically the whole Northeast and Northwest (plus Illinois and Michigan if they want to come along). They get Wal-Mart and Duke and most of the Nascar tracks. But they can feel free to import movies, TV shows, financial services, and defense technology. We’ll import country music, bibles and Confederate flags.
The two countries will by necessity have open immigration policy: anyone who feels they are living in the wrong country can just move across the border, no questions asked.
Ultimately, why should I have to convince my fellow countrymen that Darwin may have had a point and that the word ‚Äúliberal‚Äù is not equivalent to ‚Äúgodless communist?‚Äù And why should they be forced to live in a country with morally corrupt non-believers? I’ll stay in the messy, free-thinking U.S.A.B. And to the U.S.A.R. I say‚Ķ
God bless you all, and see you at the U.N
————————————————————-
Hmmmm…. why does this actually sound like a good idea to me?
Courtesy of Boing Boing.
LUDO has a show this Friday (November 5) in Tempe, AZ at:
Minder Bender’s
715 S. McClintock Dr.
w/ Holden.
All Ages - 8:45pm
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